Ha ha ha ha ha that woman crapping herself cannot be real. And what's with the giant turds ha ha ha Good funnys Ledge

A Chinese man arranged for a hooker to come to his room for the evening. Once in the room they undressed, climbed into bed, and went at it. When finished, the Chinese man jumped up, ran over to the window, took a deep breath, dove under the bed, climbed out the other side, jumped back into bed with the hooker and commenced a repeat performance.

The hooker was impressed with the gusto of the second encounter. When finished, the Chinese man jumped up, ran over to the window, took a deep breath, dove under the bed, climbed out the other side, jumped back into bed with the hooker and started again!

The hooker was amazed at this sequence. During the fifth encounter, she decided to try it herself. When they were done she jumped up, went to the window and took a deep breath of fresh air, dove under the bed to find 4 other Chinese men.

A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale has hit Pakistan.
Two million Pakistanis have died and over a million are injured.

The country is totally ruined and the government doesn't know where to start with providing help
to rebuild.    The rest of the world is in shock.

The USA is sending troops to help.
Saudi Arabia is sending oil.
Latin American countries are sending supplies.
New Zealand is sending sheep, cattle and food crops.
The Asian continents are sending labour to assist in rebuilding infrastructure.
Australia is sending medical teams and supplies.
Britain, not to be outdone, is sending two million replacement Pakistanis.
God Bless British generosity.

An Australian Aboriginal picks up a hooker.

'How much do you charge for da hour, sister?' he asks.

'$100,' she replies.

He says 'Do you do Aboriginal style?'

'No' she says.

'I pay you $200 to do it Aboriginal style'

'No', she says, not knowing what Aboriginal style is.

'I pay you $300'

'No', she says.

'I pay you $400'

'No', she says.

So finally he says, 'OK, I pay you $1,000 to do it Aboriginal style..'

She thinks, 'Well, I've been in the game for over 10 years now.

I've had every kind of request from weirdos from every part of the world.

How bad could Aboriginal Style be?''.

So she agrees and has sex with him.

They do it in every kind of way and in every possible position.

Finally, after several hours, they finish.

Exhausted, the hooker turns to him and says,

'Hey, I was expecting something perverted and disgusting.

But that was good.

So what exactly is 'Aboriginal style'?'


The Aboriginal replies 'You send da bill to da Gub'ment'  

Engineer Husband
  
A wife says to her engineer husband, "Could you please go to the store for me and buy a carton of milk. And if they have eggs, get a dozen .

A short time later the husband comes back with twelve cartons of milk

The wife asks, "Why the heck did you buy twelve cartons of milk?

 "They had eggs."

This one the Aussies might not get!

Duz tha speak Yorkshire ?
A Yorkshire man takes his cat to the vet.
Yorkshireman: "Ayup, lad, I need to talk to thee about me cat."
Vet: "Is it a tom?"
Yorkshireman: "Nay, I've browt it wi us."
.....................................................................................

A Yorkshireman's dog dies and as it was a favourite pet he decides to have a gold statue made by a jeweller to remember the dog by.
Yorkshireman: "Can tha mek us a gold statue of yon dog?"
Jeweller: "Does tha want it 18 carat?"
Yorkshireman: "No, I want it chewin' a bone, yer daft bugger!"
....................................................................................

Bloke from Barnsley with piles asks chemist, "Nah then, lad, does tha sell arse cream?"
Chemist replies, "Aye, Magnum or Cornetto?"

....................................................................................

Police have just released details of a new drug craze prevalent in Yorkshire nightclubs.
Apparently, Yorkshire clubgoers have started injecting Ecstasy just above their front teeth.
Police say the dangerous practice is called `E by gum`.

A bloke goes to the doctor for a check up

and the doctcor tells him he has 3 months left to live.

He devastated  and asks what he should do about the

situation.The doctor says"give up drinking,smoking and sex."

The chap replies'will I live longer?"

The doctor says"No,but it will feel like it"

exellent as always mate... 

if i had a few more drinks and" "IT" had tuck the nuts away i would of banged that!!!!!!

.................i did say would off............

Something different.

http://www.slothster.com/2352-Cat-On-Boat-Plays-With-Dolphins.html

fridays funnys is awesome , well done as always, also some great jokes specially the engineer joke hahaha

Did you hear about the seamans wife who leaves a box of OMO in the window to signal her lover "On My Own"?

When hes home its a box of FAB in the window -- "F++ken Assholes Back"!

that kitty rules