Friday Funnys
Submitted by ledge64 on Fri, 2015-09-18 06:46
Enjoy 
Image Upload:
groverwa
Posts: 286
Date Joined: 21/07/14
oldie but goodie After a
He begins to worry.
'Is this your husband?' he nervously asks.
'No, silly,' she replies, snuggling up to him.
'Your boyfriend, then?' he continues.
'No, not at all,' she says, nibbling away at his ear.
'Is it your dad or your brother?' he inquires, hoping to be reassured.
'No, no, no! You are so hot when you're jealous!' she answers.
'Well, who in the hell is he, then?' he demands.
She whispers in his ear
'That's me before the surgery.' ...
groverwa
Posts: 286
Date Joined: 21/07/14
What are Kids for!!!! From
her son: "Jimmy! Jimmy!"
I turned a corner into another aisle and found a six-year-old by himself playing with some umbrellas.
"Are you Jimmy?" I asked.
"Yes."
"Didn't you hear your mother call?"
"Yes."
"Aren't you going to go to her?"
He shook his head. "She's not hysterical yet."
groverwa
Posts: 286
Date Joined: 21/07/14
Ladder in heaven Joe arrives
Ladder in heavenJoe arrives at Heaven's gates and meets St Peter. He's about to go in when Peter says, 'Hey wait a minute, what about all the bad things you have said about people?'
Joe says,
'What do I have to do to get in?
St Peter is standing beside a huge ladder that goes into the sky. 'You need to climb that ladder and put a chalk mark on every rung, for every bad thing you have ever said about anyone. I'll tell you when to stop climbing.'
Joe starts climbing and putting chalk marks and calls out after 100 rungs, 'Is that enough?'
'No, keep going!'
Joe calls out after 400 rungs,'Is that enough?'
'No just keep going till I tell you to stop'
He gets to 4500 and stops for a rest but just as he does someone steps on is hand.
Who is it?
It's Eddie McGuire coming down for more chalk!
The Saint
Posts: 475
Date Joined: 30/01/13
Kylie Minogue, Robbie
Kylie Minogue, Robbie Williams and Elton John were walking over a bridge.
Kylie trips and gets her head jammed between the railings.
With a sideways glance, Robbie pulls aside her G-String and shags her senseless.
He stands back and tells Elton, "Your turn!"
Elton bursts into tears.
"What's up?" asks Robbie.
Elton sobs, "My head won't fit through the railings!"
kirky79
Posts: 1356
Date Joined: 13/01/12
Haha